I’m not sure what I’m supposed to make of this.
People say that many have a “mid life crisis”. I’m not calling it a crisis; it’s more of a reassessment of my past and possible future.
I think of the first 20 odd years growing up around NYC, not realizing how good I had it, and not having accomplished much (who really does?). My 20s would bring upheaval and turmoil to my life (for which I’m grateful in some respects). My 30s brought a genetic disorder to the surface (that had been bothering me since I was 20) that stopped me in my tracks.
I’ve since managed to get a grip of myself, straighten out several things that languished unfinished for years, and am now looking at the possibilities that lay before me.
I’m finding material possessions are lame and a burden. I’ve given up the typical desktop computer for a laptop. It took a few tries; an iMac, then a Powerbook, and now a small PC laptop. I’ve weeded out most of my LPs and CDs down to MP3 files and my iPods. I scrutinize all my clothing once or twice a year. If I haven’t worn it, to the charities it goes. Ditto on the shoes, though they just get tossed. It takes some time getting past the typical “you need this” mentality that is typical of Americans.
I’d like to be in a relationship, but that will come when it happens. I’m not going to go looking for it to happen. I have a couple of really good friends in my life, and my relationship with my family is about as good as it gets.
J
